


Glowstick fun

by Ceileice



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: G is not for god its for saGan duhhh, Glowsticks, Other, glowstick, glowstick fun, glowstick shit, kurapika loves science, very colorful fanfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-28
Updated: 2015-08-28
Packaged: 2018-04-17 15:01:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4671056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ceileice/pseuds/Ceileice
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>they discover glowsticks</p>
            </blockquote>





	Glowstick fun

One day Kurapika was shopping at Wal-Mart with his kids. No, they weren't actually his kids. They were little shits.

So Kurapika was shopping at wal-mart and he was so happy!!

He found a My Little Pony T-shirt for his homeboy Killua for only $4!

Killua was happily pushing the cart but Gon was dumb.

"Gon, why are you dumb?" Killua asked.

Gon grabbed Killua's cheeks and tugged on them so that he was smiling.

Kurapika said, "fucking shits please stop we're in fucking WALMART okay?"

Gon and Killua did not understand since they were dumb kids.

So like Kurapika picked up a box of pizza rolls, because he's Kurapika and he's too fucking lazy to make dinner for kids that aren't even his. He also picked up more gross shit like Lunchables, Kool-Aid(s), and Hot Pockets for himself.

"Ok kids now let's look for toys." he said as he walked into the kids crap aisle.

There were lame toys like stuffed animals, fake fucking clay food, and worst of all BARBIE. WHO THE FUCK PLAYS WITH BARBIE?!?!?

Killua picked up a Barbie doll. "Crapika I want this."

Kurapika slapped the Barbie out of Killua's hand. "Fuck no."

Gon picked up another Barbie. "Yes I want this so I can be the bad Barbie for Killua's Barbie and beat him the fuck up in Barbie wrestling oh yeah."

Crapika smacked the Barbie out of Gon's hands too.

"Fuck no. You fartasses are too fucking young for Barbie, she is too good for you."

Gon and Killua frowned. Secretly, they wanted to be the next Ken.

Then Kurapikass said, "I am a man of science myself, so let's look for some fun SCIENCE things okay."

But Gon asked, "Do you tip your fedora, you science loving faggot?"

Crapika bitch slapped him.

Gon cried.

Killua ate a barbie doll.

So like they pushed the cart further through the aisle and LOW AND BEHOLD.

there was the gLOWSTICKS.

"Oh My saGan!" Kurapika said, "This is Science and I love science. We are buying this kids."

Gon frowned. "I hope Killua doesn't shove one up his ass."

Killua was angry because he was a tsundere.

Crapikass picked up all the glowstick boxes because he has that kind of money, he's a hunter.

"TO THE CHECKOUT WE GO!"

The person at the checkout was none other than Milluki, the minimum wage fatass mexican teenager.

"the fuck is this shit?" he asked, "You throwin' a glowstick party, eh ,mate?"

"Fuck you aussie!" Killua screamed to his adopted brother. He always got his country of origin wrong.

"Now, now," Kurapika reassured, "Be nice."

"Glowstick party though..." he continued...

He came up with Hunter-kind's greatest idea.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was 9 o clock at night. Most good Christian children were going to bed, like Chrollo.

However, sciencey people like Kurapika were staying up all night to get lucky.

He was throwing a GLOWSTICK PARTY!!!

Everyone was invited, except Chrollo because he doesn't believe in the sciences.

Hisoka was there too.

Hisoka was amusing himself watching Gon and Killua battle eachother with glowsticks.

He was getting turned on... oh no...

Meanwhile Kurapika turned off all the lights because its fucking cooler that way.

"ALRIGHT KIDS AND CLOWNS ITS SCIENCE TIME STOP PARTYING!!!" he screamed.

The kids and clowns did not stop partying.

Then Leorio said, "what about me babe, I'm no kid or clown. I am an oreo."

"Leorio, we talked about this. You can't be black AND white. It's either one or the other." Kurapika answered.

"Can I be black and red velvet then??"

"Hmmm that sounds like Science so I say Yes."

Leorio was happy. He liked science because all doctors like science right??? But he didn't like science as much as Kurapika did.

Kurapika took notice of the fact that nobody cared about Science Time so he said. "May Lord saGan stab you with a scientific fork."

Then Kurapika took all of the kids' beer (he served alcohols at all his parties with kids, he don't give n0 fuck about the law), broke a glow stick, and poured the strange fluid in the dumb stick into the beer.

The beer mug said 'Gon' so it was Gon's beer.

"IF I PUT THIS IN HERE WHAT SCIENTIFIC THINGS WILL HAPPEN???" he asked.

He then forced the beer on Gon.

"Drink it."

Gon slapped Kurapika with a glowstick and said, "no fucker go suck on a glowstick DILDO!"

Killua gasped!

Then Leorio interrupted, "Uummm excuse me he can only suck on m-"

"SCIENCE!!" Kurapika yelled.

"yes that too" Leorio said sadly.

So Gon shrugged and thought, "Hey, maybe this will make me enjoy getting drunk."

He drunk the glowstickjuice beer.

All of a sudden, something really cool happened.

GON STARTED GLOWING IN THE FUCKING DARK!

KILLUA SCREAMED! "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH"

Hisoka took notice of that and licked his lips. Glow in the dark Gon!

Then Gon said, "HOLY FUCK THIS IS COOL!!"

So Kurapika spiked everyone's drinks with glowstick fluid.

Killua drank the beer and his buttcheeks glowed in the dark WOW.

Illumi CRIED!

"KILLU WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT NATURAL."

Killua's shoved a glowstick up Illumi's ass and Illumi couldn't get it out.

"Hisoka help me" he said.

Hisoka was fixated on Killua's Glowing Ass Cheeks though.

Illumi was sad.

Bisky was there too because she's an old hag who likes whiskey. And she drank whiskey.

Kurapika spiked her whiskey.

she glowed and everyone thought she was a Christmas Tree.

"OH MY GOD GET THE FUCK OUT YOU NON-SCIENCE LOVING FUCK!" Kurapika yelled.

"I like the iPhone 7." she plainly answered.

Kurapika calmed down.

Hisoka tapped Kurapika on the butt which made Leorio yell "FUCKING CLOWN GET OUT OF MY CAR!!!"

"You don't have any fucking cars asswipe." the clown-man answered plainly.

Leorio cried glow in the dark tears because it was true. Kurapika sold his car for drug money.

"Fine whatever."

Meanwhile Gon was trying to play Smack That Ass Bitch with Killua, whose buttcheeks were shining like Pariston's gold suit.

Speaking of that asshole,

"hey guys what's up" Pariston said. He was wearing a glow in the dark suit.

That made Kurapika cringe angrily. "OH MY GOD HIS SCIENCE SWAG IS HIGHER FUCK HIM!"

Hisoka said, "I will fuck him."

Gon farted and his fart glowed in the dark and it knocked out Hisoka.

So Kurapika tackled Pariston and pulled his suit off and now Pariston was NAKED HAHA!

Kurapika put on the suit but you see Kurapika is a Small Man so the suit was Too Big.

"This wouldn't even fit fucking Leorio!!!" he screamed but he had science swag now, "Butt man this is class... NOT SWAG."

Leorio said, "haha BUTT man..."

Then Cheadle saw Pariston naked and she gasped! "EWWWWW EVEN HIS JINGLY BALLS ARE GLOWING IN THE DARK!!"

She puked neon green and ran away angry. Now she had to read angsty fanfiction all over AGAIN.

Pariston cried for his lost suit. Without his suits he was fucking shit, worthless, trash, SHIT.

Ging patted him on the shoulder "bro, it's okay. My kid is trying to touch another boy's ass and you know that's how it always starts. Didn't it begin that way with us?"

Pariston cried totemo sugoi tears! "OMG GING YOU ARE THE VOICE OF REASON, YOU ARE BAE!" so they were GAY.

Ging's hair was neon purple because he drank the purple glowstick. He also enjoyed Purple koolaid.

Bisky was doing Mito-san's nails because she was older than Mito.

"I'm so proud of my gay nephew!" she smiled.

Then Kurapika interrupted again, "Excuse me, I think I've had enough science for tonight."

But you see Gon stopped chasing Killua and he thought now was a good opportunity to pull Kurapika's (Pariston's) suit pants down.

and down they went.

Gon gasped because he was behind Kurapika, he could see the glowing shining buttcheeks.

"EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!" he screamed. He was a dumb kid afterall.

Kurapika bitch smacked Gon.

"IT TAKES A REAL MAN OR VAGINA OF SCIENCE TO APPRECIATE GLOWING CHEEKS LIKE THIS."

Killua nodded. "Yeah Gon, besides, your ass is glowing too. Why do you think Hisoka is staring at it?"

Gon kicked Hisoka in the penis. "I DON'T FUKING CARE!"

Hisoka's glow in the dark penis fell off and he cried.

Then Chrollo, who lived next door, barged in and yelled, "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE I'M TRYING TO READ MY BIBLE BED TIMES STORIES AND I HEAR THIS FUCKING SHIT !!"

Kurapika kicked Chrolley in the Trolley.

Chrollo saw the glowing buttcheeks and SCREAMED!

"VERY UNCHRISTIAN-LIKE CRAPIKA!"

Kurapika retorted, "VERY UNSCIENCE-LIKE CHROLLO!"

Then Gon ruined the moment by playing his favorite song, Baby Got Back.

he sang, "I LIKE BIG BUTTS AND I CANNOT LIE!"

Killua twerked to the beat with his glowing asscheeks.

Hisoka assclapped as well.

Chrollo saw very un-Christian things so he got the fuck out of there and ran home to go to bed. He hugged his Rarity plushie and kissed it ten times before crying himself to sleep. He was wearing a yellow onesie.

"WHeN A GURL WALKS IN WITH AN ITTY BITTY WAIST AND A ROUND THING IN YOUR FACE, YOU GET SPRUNG!" Gon chanted happily!

Illumi was sad. Why was Gon singing that song.

Mito approved of it.

Killua twerked against the fireplace.

Hisoka got jiggly with it.

Bisky painted her toenails.

Ging draw a smiley face on Pariston's butt, and Pariston was happy about that for some stupid reason.

Tonpa spiked his own beer with laxatives, so when he pooped it was neon BLUE poop shit farts ploop farts poo00oop ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Leorio was trying to find weed.

And Kurapika, our beloved protagonist, joined in on the twerking despite the fact that he had no fucking pants on and clapped dem thighs.

the end.

**Author's Note:**

> a 6 year old wrote this


End file.
